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Ready-to-drink cocktail review: Beatbox (Part 1)

Posted by Jaime Fowler on

Beatbox party punch reviewed by The Pursuit of Cocktails

Hi cocktail lovers! This week I'm trying half of the Beatbox Party Punch line. (I'll be back next week with the final three flavors.) Right off, I love the styling and the bright colors of this brand and I think this is the first ready-to-drink cocktail that I've tried that is packaged in the coconut water style jugs. As I was checking these out I did notice that each container is three cocktails so they are meant to be shared which is handy.

The other thing that jumped out to me was the ingredient list. These are made with an orange wine base which is something other brands do as well. It is a way to make drinks cheaper because wine is taxed at a different rate or something. It is also usually a sign of a cheaply made, fake tasting drink. Personally, I don't consider orange wine based drinks to be cocktails because they don't contain any liquor. They are wine. It is the same story as malt beverages. Those are basically flavored beer. But with that being said, I am always here to trying things so you don't have to. (You're welcome 😂  )

Fingers crossed these ready-to-drink party punches are going to be as tasty as they are cute. I grabbed a pack of my multicolored paper straws to dress them up a bit and I loved how the colors matched so well! So let's do this. On to the drinks!

Here is my official review of Beatbox's Blue Raspberry, Fresh Watermelon & Pink Lemonade:

2 out of 5 cocktail shakers

I tried the Blue Raspberry first and it tasted exactly like I expected it to. It was super sweet with a strong berry flavor. It wasn't bad in the grand scheme of things but as far as it being a good cocktail, I'm going to say no. It was more like a blue energy drink with booze. Also, it is the exact color of Windex soooo . . .
The Fresh Watermelon was up next and it surprised me. It tastes way more like watermelon than I expect it to. The Blue Raspberry had a very artificial taste which is sort of what I expected but the Fresh Watermelon didn't have that same fake flavor. It was pretty good.
I tried the Pink Lemonade last and it was just like the super sweet, fake lemonade flavor I was expecting. Again, not awful, but also not really a cocktail.
Overall, these Beatbox party punches are on the cheap booze end of the spectrum rather than an actual cocktail. The flavors aren't bad so I'll give them credit for that. I would have probably loved these in college when I was broke and looking to get the most bang for my buck. The lack of liquor makes them a no for me but I'm old now 😜  so I think I'm just not the right demographic for this brand. I'd love to hear what you think of them! Let me know in the comments. 

Sweetness

5 out of 5 cocktail shakers
One shaker = not sweet at all  // Five shakers = your teeth may curl

Sweet, sweet, sweet! While there was some difference between the three that I tried, overall they are very sweet. The Blue Raspberry was the sweetest, the Fresh Watermelon was in the middle, and the Pink Lemonade was the least sweet but still super sweet. 

One thing worth noting here is that they are strongly sweetened with artificially sweetener. For me, that is a recipe for a stomach ache when combined with the level of booziness so just keep that in mind if you are sensitive to that type of thing too.
 

Booziness

3 out of 5 cocktail shakers
One shaker = does this have booze? Five shakers = OG Four Lokos

The Beatbox party punches officially ring in at 11.1% ABV but keep in mind there are three cocktails in one jug so just go ahead and triple that if you plan to drink the whole thing. Is that how that math works?? I'm not sure but it seems right. LOL 

Would I buy this ready to drink cocktail again?

Honestly, probably not. No shade at all to Beatbox, I'm just past the party punch phase of my life I think. I prefer a ready-to-drink cocktail that is more like a swanky bar cocktail, made with real liquor, and a more complex flavor.

I do think there is definitely room for these in the ready-to-drink cocktail market. They would be super easy to toss in a cooler for a float trip or day at the beach and they have three cocktails per container so I'm guessing you'd get a pretty good buzz if you drank a full one. 

If you want to try Beatbox part punch, you can order them online from Total Wine. Here is a link:

Order Beatbox ready-to-drink party punch from Total Wine here.

I'll be back next week to try the final three Beatbox flavors. I'm holding out hope that I'll love the peach one. Until next week cocktail lovers, Cheers!  

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Ready-to-drink cocktail review

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